It's been a month since I've posted. I've been vacationing in Happy City. It's a place where all that matters is that I have this little kitten that needs me and loves me and even though she bites me endlessly, it's not out of desire to hurt, it's playful loving...but mostly teething. Mollie is much like a child, going through the stages, but at a much quicker rate and they all overlap. She is going through teething, much like a baby, she needs to chew on something, which might be my finger, but it hurts much more than a baby with one tooth. She's also a toddler..she's endlessly running around and sometimes I want to hold her down to kiss and hug and cuddle, and she's like let me be free! haha. And recently she started acting like a pre-teen, putting her paw on my mouth telling me to be quiet! lol. But she's not a teen, thank God! She adores me and watches me all the time, totally intrigued at what I'm doing, like brushing my teeth. She looks at me adoringly...but sometimes its a trick and she wants to bite my nose..it is starting to hurt more, but I still love her anyway, because sometimes the ones we love hurt us, sometimes accidentally and sometimes on purpose. But Mollie always follows it with a lick on the face, and even though her sandpaper tongue is a bit too rough at times, I let her, because I know that this is her only way to show me how much she loves me and how much she wants to take care of me, and that I belong to her. She's doing what her own cat momma did to her after she was born, and for those first few weeks, until the owner of that cat disgustingly threw her and her siblings in the dumpster, instead of doing the humane thing and taking them to a shelter. But I never would've found Mollie, if she was in a shelter. I wasn't looking for her. I didn't even know that I needed her. She came into my life, through a family I visit, and captured my heart. And even though she keeps jumping on this keyboard and deleting things and messing up the computer screen...nothing she can do will ever make me love her less. She's the pea to my pod, the ice cream to my cone, the best thing to happen to me in a long long time. And I wasn't even looking for her. I was waiting for my dog! Isn't that funny? In life, we might be looking for one thing, and the opposite comes into our lives. We can't say- "wait a second, you weren't what I was looking for, so be away with you!" When you know it's right, it's right. If you let love come in, it will overtake you with such joy and belonging and light up your life. Doesn't mean I won't ever get a dog. I most certainly plan on giving Mollie a playmate, but I know that that little puppy will come in due time. It might not be in my time, but she will show up in my life, in just the right moment. And Mollie will love her as much as I do. There's a lot we can learn from stepping back and letting what will be will be. Que Sera, right? I have no more control over my life and who comes into it, than I do about what the car next to me on the highway will do, or how the kid I work with will behave that day when I see him. I can only control how I respond. Do I frustratingly raise my voice to him to sit his butt down? or do I take a deep breath and give him a moment to get it out of his system and then redirect him to a fun toy that I know he'll love? Do I yell and cuss and give the car next to me a honk and a finger when he drifts near me? Or do I slow down and let him pass and stay more alert to what he might do?
So all that to say, I am LIVING in Happy City, not just vacationing. I am choosing to stay here and I hope I continue to make the right choice! Because it can be rainbows and unicorns here in my cozy home with my kitty baby. The world out there may not be that, but I put on my glasses that come from inside this home of mine, and walk out my front door, and it's like Emerald City out there! All green and sparkly and beautiful! And that's just how I like it, but when the dark story black clouds roll in and a tornado threatens to strike, I know that it won't stay long and I'll ride out the storm and wait for that rainbow I so love to come out...and maybe it'll be a double rainbow this time :o)
